I realised just now that since I've started blogging I've posted nothing about myself so today's post is dedicated to a few observations I've made about myself that are slightly uncommon or seem strange to me. Some are in fact the opposite of what I'd believed.
Only today I realised that unlike most people revenge never motivates me. For example if someone insults my work I am never driven by my ego to prove to them my quality of work. I never have the urge to prove anything to anyone...in that sense you could call me a pretty un-motivated person although I am passionate about a lot of things. That might seem very contradictory but I can only do well in things that I enjoy doing like Art or Theatre. Even in these cases, I am not motivated to do well, I think I just really enjoy practising and hence sometimes do moderately well.
With all the talk about confident and strong women going on everywhere, I formed a notion about myself that I too was very confident and strong, which eventually changed. I realised that these two things were absolutely missing from my personality and this in turn makes me even less confident. I am infact filled with a heap of insecurities that very often drive me while making decisions. I have my own principles and believe in a lot of things that are more often than not different from what others believe, but I realised that most of the times I do not have the strength to stand up for what I believe in or even tell anyone my beliefs in fear of judgement. But, now that I've realised I try very hard to be confident about myself and stand up for things that I don't feel are right. I feel that it is very natural to judge someone but it is in my hands to decide whether or not anybody's judgement is going to affect me
Yes that's my observations of the week. I quite enjoyed this so I am thinking about posting one post where I talk about new things that I observed or learned.
